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Monday, May 26, 2003
Soundtrack: Pretty little fashion face Pick anyone up off the shelf Though you say it's a disgrace You know you owe it to yourself You can even shop around Though you won't find any cheaper She's your baby now You can keep her --Elvis Costello, "Tiny Steps" Axioms: "Canada is an act of faith, which like the Eucharist, cannot be reduced to a lapel pin." --David Olive, Toronto Star "The Times has been living off the Pentagon papers, and the Post its Watergate legacy for 30 years. They may think those are still great medals they're wearing but it doesn't justify the way they've fallen down on the job before Bush. Nixon really did put the squeeze on the press, but this is a voluntary servitude. Both have become subservient to power." -- Vanity Fair media critic James Wolcott in the Observer "The truth knocks at the door, and you say, 'Go away, I'm looking for the truth.' And it goes away. Puzzling." --Robert Persig "In true Survivor fashion, the people on my show who were dying to get seen went pushing and shoving to get down to Richard [Hatch]. And we're like, you know, of course, being from Rhode Island, we were looking for fire exits." --Helen Glover in the ProJo "We all live in fairly dangerous times in terms of freedom of speech and freedom of expression. A lot of the songwriters that I've admired and learned from ... are people who spoke in matters of conscience as well as matters of the heart. I think that it's essential that we defend that right." --Elvis Costello The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To the rain. You did your job, now go away for a while. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: To Explorer, which locked for seventeen minutes when midnight rolled around. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To the various people and things that make my life more bearable just by being. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Now the breakwall reminds me of Newfoundland. Assessment: Can barely move. Famous last words: "It's just so fucked." --Me Sunday, May 18, 2003
Soundtrack: No one knows what it's like To be the bad man To be the sad man Behind blue eyes No one knows what it's like To be hated To be fated To telling only lies But my dreams They aren't as empty As my conscience seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That's never free No one knows what it's like To feel these feelings Like I do And I blame you No one bites back as hard In their anger None of my pain and woe Can show through But my dreams They aren't as empty As my conscience seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That's never free When my fist clenches, crack it open Before I use it and lose my cool When I smile, tell me some bad news Before I laugh and act like a fool If I swallow anything evil Put your finger down my throat If I shiver, please give me a blanket Keep me warm, let me wear your coat No one knows what it's like To be the bad man To be the sad man Behind blue eyes --Pete Townshend Axioms: "What I want to be a part of is to finally lay to rest those poor people who have died and yet continue to vote." --Lydia M. Rivera, newly appointed member of the Providence Board of Canvassers. It's about time! "The decamping Democrats have attracted national attention and some support. But they should beware. Hunting renegade politicians across the prairie has bipartisan appeal for an electorate with a generally low opinion of its representatives and a fierce attachment to guns and field sports. This idea could catch on, especially after the Clinton ban on Uzis and AK-47s expires next year." --Guardian editorial about those fabulous Texas Dems "FUCKING PAWTUCKET!" --Me, reflecting on getting my first speeding ticket in more than ten years "And of course the capacity to be outraged and appalled has been entirely drained out of you, out of this nation, replaced by raging ennui and sad resentment and the new fall season on NBC. This is what they're counting on. Your short attention span. WMDs? That's so, like, last February." --Mark Morford "Every day, get up and remind yourself that you need to live a purpose-driven life. . . . You've got to go in a quiet place by yourself and ask, 'What is my purpose?' "Can it be that you were put in this position for such a time as this?" --Lt. Col. Martha McSally, who took on the Pentagon and the Saudis. Commencement speech at Rhode Island College. The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To the Providence Journal, for not putting their Saturday and Sunday letters to the editor on the web. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: Why can't I find unsalted soy nuts? And why am I craving them, anyway? Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To poor Tom C., who really needs it. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Dunkin Donuts has an ad on the bus shelter right outside of Krispy Kreme. Now that is funny. Assessment: They gave me two free hot doughnuts. I needed some protein but got an extra helping of fat with a sugar garnish. But it was good! Famous last words: "I know when I'm not needed." --Me Wednesday, May 14, 2003
Soundtrack: I stayed awake for hours again last night Searching for a reason to keep up the fight I've made choices I don't regret I've got problems I don't get I didn't want to carry the heavier load You can't always take the middle road There comes a time when you make up your mind And the point gets left behind Oh let's wait one more day for the conversation One more day to make it right Let's get away from the confrontation One more day just buying time For years and years you can drift alone And write another verse to an endless song Wait one more day till the time is right Hoping that you both see the light You won't see the light Oh let's wait one more day for the conversation One more day to make it right Let's get away from the confrontation One more day just buying time I'm not afraid to sleep alone I'm not afraid to be alone Stayed awake for hours again last night Just searching for a reason to keep up the fight I've made choices I don't regret But I've got problems and problems and problems and problems... Oh let's wait one more day for the conversation One more day to make it right Let's get away from the confrontation One more day just buying time --Great Big Sea, "Buying Time" Axioms: "He saw something? Ask him if he's Catholic. He might've seen the Virgin Mary. She's been showing up in every driveway, oil spill and thawing icicle from Buffalo to Matamoros." --Bartcop, on the Miami Herald employee who claimed to see something in the jockey's hand "Also, I think people are being unnecessarily critical of the monkeys. There are plenty of times when urinating, defecating, or beating on a computer with a rock are not only appropriate gestures but also the best course of action." --Nik, in response to article about monkeys and a computer in the last issue "One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors." --Plato "Where did this idea come from that everybody deserves free education, free medical care, free whatever? It comes from Moscow, from Russia. It comes straight out of the pit of hell." --Texas state Rep. Debbie Riddle, proving the above quote "I don't think there's a section for "first cousin once removed," but this is Rhode Island, so there ought to be." --Me, while looking for a birthday card The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To local politicians who are contemplating filling the budget hole by taxing clothes. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: To the jury that voted to give Jenna the million. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To the Cranston City Council, for finally getting the hell out of Krispy Kreme's way. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Too bad our General Assembly doesn't go into hiding too. Assessment: Must stay awake. Need protein. Other than that, okay. Famous last words: "I know when I'm not needed." --Me Saturday, May 10, 2003
Soundtrack: Through the line of trees I dream Of only good remembering I think of you Was it, was it ever so bad, my friend? And what was, what was ever so bad, my friend? --Carbon Leaf Axioms: "(Historical note: this item marks the first time in AP history the words 'touch football,' 'suburban high school girls' and 'splattered with feces' all appeared in the same sentence. Please make a note of it)." --Mark Morford in the Daily Fix, commenting on this item "Researchers at Plymouth University in England reported this week that primates left alone with a computer attacked the machine and failed to produce a single word. "'They pressed a lot of S's,' researcher Mike Phillips said Friday. 'Obviously, English isn't their first language.'" --AP article on an interesting experiment. You can even see for yourself what they wrote. "Molly's hair is still lighter than it was, but at least it's not curly anymore. Also, she gave a great speech." --My "send this article to a friend" note about this article. Go Molly! The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To the technical problems that vexed poor Bartcop so much that he didn't publish a new page Thursday. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: The only person who regularly sends me faxes is the only person who has ever reported it not working--pretty much every time she tries. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To our local letter carriers, for collecting food for the hungry today. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Yes, I know I quote the same sources all the time. Do you have any suggestions? Assessment: Pulling an all-dayer, so will be punchy soon. Better get my reading done now. Famous last words: "I know when I'm not needed." --Me Friday, May 09, 2003
Soundtrack: I couldn't sleep at all last night 'Cause I had so much on my mind I'd like to leave it all behind But you know it's not that easy --Great Big Sea, "Consequence Free" Axioms: "In the column, titled 'The Yellow,' O'Donnell describes how fame robbed her of her 'yellow'-- a metaphor she uses for energy and happiness. "'It started to show on my face and body. And as I became bigger and sadder--starved for yellow,' she writes. 'I filled my craving with food--getting madder still with my expanding girth and with my inability to make more yellow.'" --AP article about Rosie O'Donnell's new Advocate column. How long before she resumes bashing us activists again? "Voltaire said, 'I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.' Today we are hearing radio industry executives saying, 'I disapprove of what you say and I am going to stop you from ever saying it again.'" --Nancy Skinner, Buzzflash interview about her campaign to support the Dixie Chicks The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To board members who do not even bother to phone it in. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: Explorer wouldn't allow me to highlight one sentence, only the entire page. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To poor Rodney. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: I have recently dreamed more than once that I was on Survivor. Why? Assessment: Desperately hoping to fight off an eye infection. Famous last words: "You are a very smart person." --Be that as it may, let's hope it works Thursday, May 08, 2003
Soundtrack: They took me in the office And they told me very carefully The way that I could benefit From death and disability --Elvis Costello Axioms: "Peace, man." "'Peace'? What cell of al-Quaeda are you with?" --Bartcop, on the BartPhone " Bennett also should've announced that his days of snorting powdered Chinese snail droppings, flagellating himself every morning with a copy of Hustler's 'Best Ass in the West' special double issue, and practicing his most smuggiest facial expressions in the fifteen-foot mirror installed next to the life-sized blowup doll of a weeping Jesus in his dungeon bedroom, are mostly over as well, except for the part about the tongue warts and the sporadic uncontrollable screaming and the recurring fantasies of being carried off into the sunset by big sweaty men on Harleys." --Mark Morford in the Daily Fix "Why does Joe Lieberman remind me of a lawn gnome?" --Marty of Bartcop E! "There are two sides to every issue: one side is right and the other is wrong, but the middle is always evil." --Ayn Rand, quoted in one of Marty's past issues "That sounds disgusting! Good thing no one watches MSNBC." --MediaWhoresOnline The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: To the Providence Journal, whose editors do not bother to check if facts asserted in letters or op-eds are even remotely true, probably because they write so many false things themselves. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: The New York Liberty changed their team colors. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To Sue Wicks, for being the only out WNBA player. Bless you. And bless whoever will come out next now that you've retired. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Keep reading--it will get better. Assessment: I forgot about this section before! Anyway, assessment is, feeling performance anxiety with regard to maintaining this page. How fucked up is that? Famous last words: "so now i'm always prepared for the knock at the door. i probably should pack a suitcase. my real hope for survival is that i'm not big enough of a fish." --Arnold Zwicky, on our difficult times Tuesday, May 06, 2003
Soundtrack: I say it's not fair But what do they care? When you've got power Then you use it for a while --Joe Jackson Axioms: "Why do you hate us so much? Seriously." --Get Your War On (read down) "Yes, these are the grownups who are running our state." --Me, multiple times recently about the same stupidity "Bump you." --Anastasia Williams. Yes, that really is what she said, despite the "reporting" of the ProJo's answer to Dr. Evil "The weather was so nice in Texas, but of course the downside of that is that you have to be in Texas." --Me The "$Include Bitnodes" Award: Belatedly, to people who refuse to follow the rules on email lists. $include bitnodes. The Skip Memorial "Hey What the Fuck?" Award: All weekend Blogger refused to publish my new blog but would publish my old ones. Hey what the fuck? The "Bless You" Award: To my little brother, for acting as his friend's agent as she makes her return back to her acting career after a hideous car accident. Bless you. The Bad Karma Quote: "Stay away from me, man. I think you got the worst karma of anyone I ever met." --The Butterfly of Love in The Milagro Beanfield War Quote of the year (so far): "GOD DAMN IT!"--T. Adler Other randomness: Am just getting this thing restarted. It will suck for a while, so be patient. Read my other blogs if you want something more coherent (FSVO). Famous last words: "Perhaps you make plans to move to Alaska." --Book I read in college. Substitute Canada, maybe. |
